MizzJ and I toast each other with white sangria at Baru Latino.
Last Saturday, MizzJ and I went out for our much-anticipated Dine Out Vancouver reservation at Baru Latino, followed by clubbing at Bar None in Yaletown. We knew that the evening would have excellent food and fun in store for us, but little did we know that it would also be rife with one-liners and random absurdities. This is just a small sampling.
"We look so complementary!"
-MizzJ upon seeing the two of us in bright yellow and blue dresses
"For God's sake, could whoever is standing by the door PLEASE move?!"
-Me on the stationary bus, which wouldn't pull away from the stop until someone cleared the entrance and the bell stopped chiming
MizzJ: "He told me his perfect movie would contain 'explosions and boobies and ninjas and zombies.'"
Me: "What about zombie boobies?"
MizzJ: "That's what I asked him! And he said those didn't count because they'd be decaying and gross."
-MizzJ and I discussing her new boyfriend's taste in films
Random guy on the street: "Hey! Hey, wait! (Runs up to us and puts his arms out, blocking our way.) I don't mean this to sound weird, but I just wanted to tell you two ladies that you're very, very beautiful. Wait a moment, this is my friend here."
MizzJ: "Wow, that was so weird! That's only the second time that's ever happened to me."
Me: "Really? What was the first time like?"
MizzJ: "Well, I was in Victoria and this random guy on a bike cycled past me and he backtracked and was like, 'Excuse me, I just wanted to stop and tell you that you're very beautiful.' I panicked and said, 'I have a boyfriend, I'm going to his place right now, and he knows kung fu!!'"
"Take your coats off. You'll get in faster."
-Bar None patron giving us advice on getting past the velvet rope
"Okay, that guy just totally looked down your dress."
-Girl standing behind us in line
Inside Bar None. We were pretty indignant over the long wait.
Me: "I hate dancers with flailing limbs."
MizzJ: "I know! Picture a bar half this size with twice as many flailing white people and that's exactly what Victoria is like."
"Dancing next to this guy is like dancing next to a wall!"
-Me to MizzJ re. the extremely tall, muscular, and immobile guy over my shoulder
MizzJ: "Ohmigod, he's so into you! He was smelling your hair!!"
Me: "I know. I could feel the back of my head hitting his forehead whenever I moved. I felt kind of bad for him actually."
Me: "Does he count as Mr. February?"
MizzJ: "No, because technically this evening is still part of January. January 31st isn't over until you sleep and the next day comes."